How possible is it to predict who's likely to have an affair? The truth is, you can never tell
The consequences of Infidelity a
relationship can be devastating especially when children are involved.
Cheating is betrayal and is one of the major causes of divorce.
According to Antonio Borrello of Huffington Post,
Researchers investigating unfaithful partners report several motives
for infidelity including: relationship dissatisfaction, emotional
neglect, anger or revenge, and sexual motives. Except for cases with
sexual motives, problems with the primary relationship are blamed for
the infidelity.
So how possible is it
to predict who's likely to have an affair? The truth is, you can never
tell but factors that can lead to infidelity can be addressed.
Borrello lists five warning signs that shows your partner might have a cheating heart:
- The Best Predictor of Future Behavior is Past Behavior: As simple as it sounds, past behaviors are the best predictor of future behaviors. History repeats itself, so you need to know your partner's past. Ask questions about relationships, their lengths and level of commitment, and inquire about why the relationships ended. And, don't skip questions about infidelity or their opinions on what is, and what is not appropriate interaction with friends. A history of past infidelity does not guarantee that infidelity will happen in a current relationship. People learn from their mistakes and experience personal growth. And when they do, they are open to sharing their lessons. But, if your partner responds to your questions with a cavalier attitude, make a mental note of this red flag and further explore this topic. Remember, those who fail to learn from mistakes of the past usually repeat them.
- Cheating Intentions: Much of the research on infidelity points to three factors that together influence one's intention to cheat. These factors include having a favorable (blasé) attitude towards infidelity, having a social network that condones or supports infidelity, and having confidence in one's ability to attract a romantic partner. Be careful, red flags are often hidden and not immediately disclosed. This underscores the importance of knowing your partner and sharing the emotional intimacy that develops through trust and feeling safe enough to disclose what's really on your mind.
- "I Love You" (Limited Time Offer, Available While Passions Last): Serial monogamy is pattern of engaging in several, intense, passionate, and short lived romantic relationships, in a series, one after the other. Serial monogamists are addicted to the thrill and passion of new love and bounce from one person to the next without regard for the pain they inflict. The good news is they are not likely to cheat on their significant other while their relationship is intense and exciting. But when those feelings wane and their attention is drawn elsewhere, they begin a new relationship before the last one ends.
- The Casanova or Aphrodite Syndrome (Ludic Love Style): The Casanova (male) or Aphrodite (female) syndrome is characterized by an obsessive desire to have sex with a variety of different partners without deep emotional investment. These Ludic lovers are players and may have several partners at a time. They regard sex as a sport and engage in relationships as long as it remains a challenge to gain control over their partner. Too often, those who get involved with a Casanova or Aphrodite become convinced of their partners undying love and loyalty and believe their new partner can change. Reality Check- these people rarely change. If he looks like a Casanova and acts like a Casanova, guess what?
- Investment Model of Relationship Commitment: In the early 1980s, social psychologist Caryl Rusbult developed the investment model of relationship commitment to explain how people become committed to and stick to their partners. According to the model, couples' commitment to relationships is contingent upon three factors: relationship satisfaction, quality of alternatives, and investments.
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