I stumbled upon a thread by one young 'lad'-y who emphatically professed how she was gonna cheat on his hubby for looking chubby. Wow!
I ran into another where some guys were giving lectures as to what they desire in their wife-to-be.
Even the marriages in my church has reduced sef. Marriage counselling hasn't stopped counselling because the cash isn't really there; Trad Wedd: Jan. 24th, White Wedd tentative date: May 11th, Haba!
As Solomon, I looked carefully and I observed keenly, the problem is rather internal than external. Things have changed and our singles aren't aware! At a Certain Age, your REQUIREMENT LIST of the spouse you want has to be cut down else you'll be deluding yourself.
Once a met a lady 30+, who said, "I really think some things I expect from my future hubby are non-existent, to be sincere. I must accept that."
Below are 7 of them- As a guy, this Epistle will go to the ladies. Ladies write ya own
1. He must be 6 feet tall.
God made some short and others tall. What does it have to do with whom you settle down with? Short lady, you can marry a short guy and give birth to tall kids. Who height even epp? Stop forming nonsense, if he truly loves and you sense it, accept and start something concrete. Don't mind your friend's advice o. You are leaving them behind. Once you are sure of the veracity of his love/affection, be focused.
2. He must be earning at least 100,000k.
Some ladies here will deny they don't care but check their hearts. Well, do I read the writing on the wall? Directly or...recession is prevalent here. How much is the least? Can't say. If you TRULY love him, you don't need my sermon to put up until he gets a breakthrough- bigger or a fresh job. I have seen couples marry small but are financial giants today. Stop "Alhajirising"! Kamar is a Dam! Nemisis is a niggur! You too, work. Build your home together. A controversial point, I guess.
3. Childishness/Immaturity.
Okay, your friends dictate how you respond to your bf. Should you be telling them in the first place? Angelina Jolie breaks up and you too take turn. Drama!!! You love him and the only way to show it is by being rude? Seriously?
4. Pride
See them saying, "Babe, some guys are so funny. Lols. They think it's everyone that's into this marriage thingy..." But, she has been in three different relationships since January. I heard one saying, 'I'm my own boss.' I hear you! Be open about it on time before you start praying, "Man na man- God, gimmie any one."
5. His Family Background
Is this important? Yes. But, it's not urgent. I mean, time would change your mind if you succumb to the power of 'destiny' and 'love'. Some say, "Ladies from OUR PLACE don't marry from THEIR PLACE o...". Is there any other definition of Ignorance than this? Don't let no MYTH, PAST Belief System or even your own parents stop you from following the one you love even if it's against you Village People's custom. Are you a village girl?
6. His Current Location.
She visits you just to take a look at your residence. If it's not up to par, she leaves you. A wife-material never does that. When ladies wants to visit, the reasons aren't many... Maybe he's still in his father's house for now, she judges him by that and chooses to celebrate her 28th birthday as a very single lady. Have you found out why? He may have plans. Don't allow comparison kill your ability to reason well. Love is sweet when it grows from little to great. Join him and build your desired home together. Guys become more responsible when a woman, good woman is in the house.
7. His Physique, Appearance, Spoken English...
All these things can be worked on. If you marry because he has abs today, what if he doesn't have tomorrow? Will you cheat on him? The Sugar Daddies some undergraduates date; they don't check their tummies o. Is marriage now mechanical? If you need some 'watering' like money, fame, looks etc, to keep loving him? Nne, you married the wrong person. His looks is inconsequential for the consummation of a happy marriage. Ask Hollywood Superstars! Is your dad still so handsome? Is your mum cheating? He speaks one-legged English, how does that concern choosing a life partner?
The essence of this is to rent in two from the minds of most 21st Century ladies that Marriage is bigger than sex, money, fame, physique (good looks), power, anointing, academic intelligence etc. So therefore, none of 'em is strong enough to keep it going strong. Love, Agape love is the only degree that the Institution of Marriage endorses and respects. Stop looking at the wrong direction to get the right result; only self- deluded folks do that. You know where to look. The ordinary places: around you. Don't judge a book by its cover. Give people a chance. Give guys a chance.
Project GiveGuysAChance.
Good morning!
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